Well it’s with this speech that I suppose signals the end of my NUS time and my time with you.

I don’t think it would be an understatement to say that it’s been the most challenging three years of my life. A pretty indescribable experience, that’s helped me grow up and deal with situations that 99 per cent of the general population wouldn’t ever have to deal with. You’ve got to be pretty thick-skinned to be in this business and being in the leadership, it has to be of rhinoceros proportions. I can’t really put being on the NEC into words and whilst I don’t think anything I’ll say will truly reflect my feelings at any point, I hope this gives a little insight into the life of an NUS full-timer, being the head bureaucrat and senior administrator but also someone who did and still does genuinely care about the organisation, the people that interact with it and students themselves.

And this wasn’t planned. I didn’t envisage my life taking this rather sharp turn into the student movement or even politics. I didn’t grow up in a political family – my parents preferring to keep their political colours close to their chests – sighting their politics as a personal thing. Still today I don’t know which way they vote – I can only hope that my time in NUS has influenced them to vote for progressive agendas on equality but, like me, they’re pretty strong headed and maybe (a little) entrenched in their ways.

My schooling wasn’t political either, growing up in Coventry. that might be a tad surprising – given its history, but my school wasn’t really into anything. People are always shocked when I regale stories about how my school was never out of “special measures” while I was there or how in my six years, I never once had a physics teacher – always given supply teachers but still expected to take a GCSE in it. My peers weren’t political or academic either nor aspired to be anything and very few went onto higher education (about six others I think). It’s a pretty drab and dire place and situation – but according to the government – no longer – a new flagship academy school is planned for it, headed by a Christian fundamentalist; concentrating on business and enterprise. And whilst physics was never it’s strongest suit – I wonder whether I’d be in the position I’m in now if my educational life was directed by business and enterprise.

Higher education wasn’t my natural route either, like I said, only very few managed to drag themselves up to the standard and I for one was never keen on standing out or being academic. It was always better to blend in at Woodway Park. Growing up gay in a school like that was literally a disaster – the poverty of the local area and poor discipline lent itself to horrendous bullying. I had other ideas though and my saviour was football – I was good and the idea (at least) was that if I were in the football team then no one would bother me or bully me. And it worked to a point. But even that didn’t really politicise me. Being gay at that age isn’t about rights or legislation, it’s about surviving and feeling stifled- looking for creative ways to get out of it – for me, this mostly meant finding creative ways to not go to school. I never realised that the feeling of isolation would turn into something so positive.

Drama
No, my grand plan was to become an actor – my parents managed to send me to an after school drama club and I found myself at the RSC doing auditions and getting parts, but, alas, exams often got in the way and my fledgling acting career took a detour. It didn’t stop me from wanting to become and actor though, and wanting to go to drama school which is what I tried and ultimately failed to do. Not, I don’t think, because I wasn’t good enough. But because of money and fees, like with so many young talented actors, I was priced out of drama school by fee levels not even experienced by International students - £8,000 per term per year were being asked and you can’t even consider a scholarship – about three were offered with 200,000 applications every time. And many of these drama schools with these horrendous fees are in NUS’ membership, something we often forget. So priced out of drama school I went through clearing to university – my only problem was that because I was so driven in the acting direction – I hadn’t bothered studying for decent A-levels and came out with less than respectable grades. (Although better than Dave Lewis’!)

Spurred on by the notion of not being able to live at home any longer I packed off to Wolverhampton – a university at the wrong end of the league table and a source for many’s amusement when I entered the NEC – you see, the notion that you can’t be political, intelligent or have any talent being from a poly is still rife in the student movement. The sniggers and screwed up faces you get when you’re announced as an events key speaker having studied theatre at Wolverhampton is still apparent in the sector and I’m not sure it will change – just look at the drop down lists on graduate recruitment websites – not at Oxbridge? Good luck. And although it can spur you on it also provides an endless amount of self-doubt and confidence issues. Songs from the AU like “your dad works for my dad” is something some people find hilarious but to be honest, it’s really not admirable or funny. It’s disingenuous to thousands of students and disingenuous to the movement’s passion for WP. That’s not to say everyone in NUS is like that – I’m proud that NUS, at times, is a vehicle where the drama student at Wolverhampton can play politics and arguments as well as the history student at Cambridge, it’s this that often defines NUS as a real development opportunity for people and that’s something to be proud of.

I’m proud of being from an ex-poly and proud of Gemma for being the first President from a post-1992 institution – it’s good for this union and good for the UK’s higher education system.

Student politics
My folly into student politics began in the LGBT campaign in my union. Whilst frustrated by the Wolves LGBT’s motto of basically, ‘let’s meet, get pissed and shag’ I decided to stand for chair, sighting “campaigning and advocacy” as something I’d bring – this wasn’t very popular though and although I got elected (by rather unscrupulous methods), most of the members left the group. I couldn’t care less though, 10 committed activists is better than 25 piss-heads. It’s in LGBT politics that I really cut my teeth and I want to thanks Alison Culpan and Carli Harper Penman who took my under their wings and got me involved. Two incredibly strong, committed women whose impassioned speeches and committed activism really made me who I am today – so thanks to them. At my first LGB conference, people were shouting at each other, arguing the finer points of the policy in quite an aggressive way. My delegation were mortified but I was hooked – One day, I thought, I’d be able to do that. It’s incredible how inspiring some people on this platform have been and continue to be.

I got elected, as an unknown, topping the block at my first conference. But the LGBT committee was the most ridiculous place you can imagine, constant crying, vicious rumours and general nastiness. It’s a place that personified the old ways of NUS – political backstabbing of grand proportions and somewhere where people genuinely felt bullied and harassed on a daily basis. But while this was going on – NUS was making a real difference to the lives of LGBT people – civil partnerships, equality act and discrimination at work became a cornerstone of Labour’s manifesto and something I’m incredibly grateful to them for. It really puts into perspective for me, the divisions within the LGBT campaign – growing up never thinking I’d have an opportunity to get married it’s a huge step forward and NUS’ involvement in this alone is a good enough argument for continued liberation support.

But the backstabbing and harassment filtered down to me and I took a big decision to leave the faction I had joined – the campaign for free education and concentrate on my degree. Being one of their shining stars (not my words conference) was something I got a lot of stick for. The campaign for free education (indie-left section) really taught me about wider internationalism and I’m eternally grateful to the members of it, who, for a time at least, treated me like a member of their family. Most people will know of my involvement in the infamous “Edinburgh” conference – and although the outcome of the election didn’t turn out to be a great success, I am proud that I played a part in getting rid of some of the nasty, vitriolic, dirty politics of one of those candidates. I actually think that election was a big turning point in the culture of NUS.

Elected
My union work, however, didn’t stop and once elected to Vice President (Student Development) it was here that my confidence grew and I began to believe I could make a real difference. I’m proud of what I achieved and learnt in that year and although, (if honest), I hated my sabb year – it taught me a few things about campaigning, non-traditional students and gave me a unique insight into a union who’s demographic was so far removed from the norm. Times were tough though and I wouldn’t have got through it without the bestest of friends you can imagine. Funny, competent, hard and generally someone who, when she campaigned on something got it, Louise Jenkins; you’re an absolute corker and I love you dearly. If you hadn’t been a sympathetic ear during those tortuous CFE years and much after I wouldn’t have survived.

But the NEC was where it was at and where I felt I could impact most. I saw NUS as something with incredible potential but with misguided priorities. The fees debate in 2004 made me want to stand for block and the hard fought campaign, only undone by a strong labour whip and backroom deals didn’t deter me from wanting to be involved. The hard-left will tell you that the NOLS/OI leadership that year didn’t really care about free education, which is why we really lost. But, of course, that’s the easy answer. Easy to blame the leadership despite them spending every waking moment on the campaign. Easy to blame NUS, because that’s what you’re really doing – damaging the organisation for personal gain and that’s shameful. For those of you who’ve read anything about the 2004 white paper will know that Tony Blair openly admits to the backroom, last minute deals that really had an impact on the outcome. Even Tony himself saying he would’ve resigned over fees was never enough for people to stop ostracising and given credit where it’s due.

It was here that I was inspired by some awesome student officers –Hannah Essex and Julian Nicholds and I decided to get in on the action by joining the organised independents. You know that group that everyone waxes lyrical about who don’t have any politics, are careerists right-wingers and the politics they do have, they hide. Yeah that lot. Reading about us you’d wonder what would make anyone want to join – other than the fact that none of that is true – and I’m not going to legitimise the scaremongering by reflecting on it too much. The bottom line is that they scaremonger because they know, deep down, that we’re the most popular group. That’s it. People hate us, write about us, lie about us and target us because we win. Student officers relate to us and respect us because we work hard. And although working hard isn’t just restricted to us – history dictates and independents work harder. No whip or block votes mean you have to work harder and deliver more and I’m confident that OIs constantly do. I’d love to list the things the OIs have introduced – creation of the environment and ethics campaign, STADIA and other things, hell it even took an OI national president to be brave enough to take on the write off that was NUS’ democratic structure. As has been said before, we’re not the right-wing candidates, we’re the right candidates and we’ve proved that year on year. Yes there are other principles involved but I hope that many will agree that Gemma and I have made the OIs more accessible and open as they ever have been historically. I know this will continue under Ama and Aaron’s leadership and I thank them both along with Hannah Essex, Julian Nicholds, Dylan Williams, Jodie Tumelty, Adam Mcnicholas, Dave Charlesworth, Louise Sweeney, Daryn McCoombe, Alice Bouquet, Hannah Bullivant, Lizzie Swarbrick. Elizabeth Somerville and Ben Whittaker. Elizabeth and Ben – two of the most talented officers I’ve come across and so different. I always thought I’d be worried leaving the OIs in someone else’s hands but between you both and Ama and Aaron, people will continue to get what they expect form OIs – listeners, deliverers, hard workers.

Dynasty
The dynasty’s important and it will live on – indies will always organise with people they think are good officers. That’s not to say that I don’t like other factions- Labour students have changed dramatically in the last three years, a little arrogant at times yes – but I think they know, deep down that they need us to keep them in line– and although I still wouldn’t join, their culture has changed too, along with the organisation. I suppose my biggest bug-bear is don’t think that what you do in your unions is any different from what we do here – it always makes me laugh when people other Indies have a go at the OIs around election having ran on a sabbatical slate themselves.

But if you fast-forward a bit to now – NUS is totally different. Looking back at those LGBT committee meetings sends a sharp shudder down my spine but the progress in NUS is unbelievable. Apart from the recent governance review arguments- people don’t cry in meetings anymore, people don’t resign nor lodge complaints about bullying. I hope that as part of the leadership I’ve had an impact in that. I hope so. I’ve tried at least.

My first election as National Secretary was probably my worst experience in NUS – the Presidential election really affected mine – and whilst the commitment from other factions to my candidacy was commendable the blatant backstabbing and lies from the previous National President wasn’t. Look, I don’t mind it if you don’t think I’m right for the job, I don’t mind if you don’t want me to win to get your own candidate elected but be honest about it – don’t tell me that I’m a talented officer and “the future” and a friend only to then write the speeches of every other candidate in my election. That stuff actually really hurts and for all the bravado, you never really get used to it.

That election gave me some real clarity about my own transparency and conduct. I’ve never pretended to support one candidate only to organise for another. In all the difficult elections – welfare last year for example, I believed I gain respect for my honesty and loyalty.

But if someone had said that my three years would’ve been taken up with Lecturers strike action, redundancy, restructure, affiliation referenda and governance – I probably would’ve run a mile. It’s been hard to say the least and I’m not too proud to say that at times depressing, sole destroying and, in fact, near resignation.

Strike
Being thrown to the lions on NUS position in the lecturers strike wasn’t easy.

Having to tell friends and colleagues that the constant deficit after deficit meant restructure and ultimately their job, wasn’t much fun

Running 13 referendums in the space a five months wasn’t the greatest use of my time and led to some albeit minor health problems

And going through this governance review has been nothing short of horrific. The utter contempt some have for this national union, for me, Gemma and others is beyond belief. I just hadn’t seen spin and lies like it. The “use anything and everyone to bash the leadership” tactic probably had the desired affect. It has affected me and made me slightly cynical and, well, shattered really. But if people think that a constant barrage of personal attack, on ednet, on my email on my phone is acceptable then, at least these days, you’re in the wrong national union.

Governance
The governance review offered real opportunity to students and students’ unions and I’m glad you’ve put faith in this leadership to deliver real change. Long may that continue. And getting the organisation to a break even budget with a enthused and focussed staff team hasn’t been easy and along with the Officers eternal thanks should go to the hard work of Matt Hyde, Jim Dickinson, Emma Cox, Philip Smith, Tim Willis and Karen Drury. Whose belief in us as officers as well as there own hard work have made all this possible.

But, of course, it didn’t pass. It was always going to be close. We were never arrogant or complacent and I am completely devastated.

I’m been sat trying to think of something to say on the vote of Tuesday, but I just feel completely numb. It feels like 2 years worth of work, 14 hour days all for nothing. And whilst I know I have achieved and impacted on the organisation and students – right now, at least, I feel like I’ve achieved nothing.

But that was Tuesday and today is today. The real victory amongst the lies and hypocrisy is a victory for Sheffield University SU, for Bangor, Edinburgh, Royal Holloway, Imperial and others whose previously over-cynical viewpoint of NUS has changed dramatically. They kept their promises by pushing for change and we kept ours to them, by throwing everything we could at it. There renewed enthusiasm for NUS and belief is the real victory here and that really is the silver lining.

How many times? How many times can people continue to call for change, how many times must students ask for a better national union before it changes? They’re exhausted with us, with the anti-governance people and unless you’re willing to get on board they’ll be exhausted with NUS.

On Tuesday the opposes said that students hadn’t been consulted, they said we needed to speak to 7 million of them to gauge their views. But what they really meant by this is to stall the process. It will take over a year to consult the amount of students they argue for, and guess what, by that time another set of students will start college and university and we’ll have to consult them, they don’t want us to change. If they did then where was there alternative? No one really made that clear on Tuesday – the number of months they had to produce an alternative – at least 7 months. And when we put in the schedules as a motion, so people could amend them, what did they do? Delete the entire thing. No amendments, no improvements, no effort.

Extremes
I could go on about the fact that it was the extremes that garnered the opposition – strange that they were the only NEC to vote against, how not one of them helped me out during five months of referendums. But you know about their delivery on these issues. A delivery record as reliable as a Fairpack Christmas Hamper.

And I’m not the only devastated one, staff are too.

I do love the staff at NUS and I hope they think I’ve been a accessible and friendly officer. Some work incredibly hard and whilst I really didn’t want to pick one person out, I do work closer with this person than anyone else. I like to thank Elaine Bruce for her Humour, intelligence and organisational skills. You really deserve a lot of credit – thanks Brucey.

There are so many things to say about my time in NUS. So many incidences that were awful and times where I’ve wanted to verbally bash individuals for their actions in this speech but, you know, that’s in the past which is probably where it should stay. It’s never wise to drag up old ground and so I wont. But there are a few things that have been said about me that I’d like to clear up.

1. I’ve never hid my affiliation to the labour party – it’s been on my blog and on my links since day 1 of the NEC election. I’ve always made clear that’s the party I support.
2. If a careerist means that I want to better myself and that I want better for my children than I had then it’s absolutely true. I’m proud to be upwardly mobile, to be given the fortune to strive for better. And for those who say that makes you more right wing, you’re frankly deluded. Striving for better is what this education system is about and somehow diminishing that is hypocritical and ridiculous.
3. Standing for NUS president. I think it was a well-known fact to most that I’d had enough early on. I never really wanted to stand, this organisation has had every ounce of my energy and I just can’t give anymore. I wasn’t bullied or backed into a corner, it was a very personal and private decision that I made which wasn’t influenced by anyone or anything else. If I were influenced by anyone else then I would have stood. Yes I think I would’ve made a good President and I’m truly grateful to all of you had said as much or sent cheeky nominations. I feel unbelievably privileged to have been considered by so many people I respect but, to be honest, the idea of another two years in NUS makes me feel slightly sick.
4. Being right-wing. What kind of society do we reflect if an ant-war, anti-fees, anti foundations hospitals, opposer of ID cards, opposer of city academies, trade unionist like me is right wing?! I can’t see one policy I’ve supported in my time that can be aligned to anything other than the left. Pragmatic maybe but left-wing I definitely am.

True feelings
But that’s not too say I’ve always been able to convey my true feelings on some issues. I’ve always found that one of the most frustrating things about being in NUS is the things you can’t say. There are debates on this conference floor and in the NEC which seem a given but issues I am diametrically opposed to. It’s almost impossible to stand here and say that you oppose faith schools and religious privilege within the Third Sector without being labelled as some kind of religion hater, partly due to people’s love of sensationalism in the student movement, partly due to the structure of our debate. But I’m a proud atheist, proud secularists and someone who will leave here and campaign for those who aren’t religious. For me, fundamentally, the idea that you will have to travel halfway across a city to get to school because you weren’t fortunate enough to be born into a specific religion dumbfounds me. And whilst most faith schools have quota’s of people from other religions – where’s the quota for those who aren’t religious?! This is a more popular view in the student movement than you might think but people are scared to say it. And we can’t continue like that. It’s difficult enough on the NEC as it is – with Israel/Palestine debates that often, go beyond sensibility. But religion Vs sexuality will rumble on in society and it’s something we’ve got to face up to here, in this hall too.

I sometimes can’t believe that I’m involved in a student movement where I defend people’s right to be religious, every step of the way, I support, campaign and work with people of all religions but then, those same people never really defend my right to be gay. It’s not everyone of course, and they are the minority but there are some people, in unions, on the NEC and on this conference floor who I don’t feel confident standing up and speaking our for my rights as a gay man. And although that’s probably the least popular thing I’ll say – I’m glad I’ve said it – because if we keep going down this road, without addressing it we will marginalise LGBT people or marginalise religious people and I don’t want either of those things to happen.

But there are others on the NEC throughout my time who are unbelievable advocates of progressive politics. Inspirational individuals who I thank daily to have had the pleasure of becoming friends with and I’d like to take this opportunity to thank them.

Gemma
– my life, it’s been a tough few years. Being President and Nat Sec for two years, during these debates is bound to put a strain on anyone’s relationship and it’s never been easy for us to maintain such a close friendship. There have been times when we’ve bickered and fought and unfortunately and that’s not surprising given a restructure, democratic review. Not too mention that we always lean on each other with our personal problems! Unfortunately some people have always taken it as an shameful opportunity to split us up – but it hasn’t worked and I think we’ve always known – during those difficult times that our friendship and respect for each other would remain. You’re an amazing person and friend but most of all you’ve been the best president this union has ever witnessed. The risks you’ve taken are beyond commendation, I don’t believe I could’ve taken them and you should be incredibly proud of your achievements. I can’t wait to continue to play such an active part in the rest of your life. Thanks for believing in me.

Ama
– The person people underestimate most on the NEC. You’re strong headed and stubborn but you’re also intelligent, caring and (more often the not) absolutely right in your convictions. You’re one of the most loving and incredible people I know. Don’t let people’s ignorance dent your confidence – you’re so talented – believe in that.

Dave
– Who is this guy?! This guy has literally kept me sane this past year. I want to thank you for your support and friendship. You make me laugh more than anyone I know and without that I’d be much worse off. Thanks for your understanding and work – you’ve made this union more transparent and accountable and I know you’ll do it again next year. We’ve been a proper partnership this year and I’ve enjoyed every minute.

Wes
– Good luck mate. People love to think we hate each other – it makes a great story but in reality I hope we remain friends in the future – we’ve been through a lot together in our two years and I think that’s grew a respect between us. You’re literally the most talented speaker I’ve ever come across and I hope that you’re as successful as we all imagine you will be.

I also want to thank Beth Walker, Veronica King and Ellie Russell who were my other fellow SMTers over the two years, don’t underestimate your part in the huge change process. You’re hard work and vision has impacted massively.

There are two other people I’d like to take a few moments to thank. Superlatives are used too often and easily in this movement to describe often average people but these two people are the officers I’m in total awe of; talented, immense campaigners who never get the credit they deserve – literally my idols, two people that inspire me and challenge me but always with total integrity - Kat Stark and Alex Kemp – thank you for just being awesome, committed individuals who will never get the credit you deserve.

Urban family
My last thanks you’s are to the rest of my urban family Hannah Essex, Julian Nicholds, Dylan Williams, Lolly, Jodie Woodward and Jodie Tumelty who support me unconditionally, listen to me whine and moan but above all have believed in me from the off. I’m indebted to you three forever, to the Jodies - you’ve impacted my life more than you will ever realise, I love you dearly and I’m so grateful to have friends like you. Thank you.

So that’s it really. I didn’t want to slag people off or revisit old arguments- as I said that’s all in the past, which is where it should stay. I think I’ve achieved a lot for NUS, but above all I hope people will think of me as someone who always put the longevity of the student movement first and always put in 100 per cent effort. I think I have. NUS now has an opportunity to move forward and truly become the great organisation it’s been threatening to be for so long. Good luck everyone and goodbye.

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