Disabled people and sex- not something really that is talked about or thought about but maybe it is time that it was. It is time that it stopped being the great taboo that it is and for non-disabled people realised that us disabled people have sexual thoughts and feelings too and that we have a right to a sexually fulfilling relationship, sex education etc. just like non- disabled people.

You see Disability Now have just got the results in from their sex survey (www.disabilitynow.org.uk) and to be quite honest some of the facts and comments are quite shocking. The magazine got more than 1,000 people to fill out sex and relationships questionnaire, making it the biggest survey of its kind in the UK. It makes interesting reading and backs up some of the comments and conversations that I have been having with students with disabilities up and down the country.

For example one student (who shall remain anonymous) asked me had I ever thought about how a young man with cerebral parsley who is getting frisky with his partner actually puts a condom on? Now I will be completely honest, this was not something I had thought about before, but yes I sat there trying to work it out. I kind of came to the conclusion that they might have to get a helping hand- which is all well and good expect what if their partner is disabled too? Can ya just imagine having to knock on your flat mate’s door and say hey I have met this really great person they’re in my room, it’s all getting a bit frisky so we need a bit of a hand putting on protection. Hell protection can sometimes ruin the moment (if that’s the right way of putting it) at the best of times. So what do you do? Surely SWD have a right to sex and protection without embarrassment or getting others involved as it were?

Another conversation that have been having with a few other people and members of the SWD committee is the fact that there are no sanitary products or condoms in accessible toilets. Does that therefore mean those women in wheelchairs don’t have periods or that people in wheelchairs don’t have sex or need to have protected sex? I don’t think so. These are all things that maybe you haven’t thought of but maybe you need to. I mean how hard would it actually be for every Union to get condom and sanitary machines installed in their accessible toilets? If they are in the male and female toilets why not the accessible ones?

I think this just goes to show that society doesn’t really like to think of us SWD as sexually people. Well I might shock ya all we are- and it is about time that we had the same rights to sexual education, protection etc. as everyone else and it is about time that the taboo of disabled people and sex was actually talked about. Hopefully surveys like the one in Disability Now but also the policy (that is below) that we passed at SWD Conference will start to get this talked about. The SWD campaign in 2005/06 will be tackling this issue and I hope that you join us in our campaign. (And finally I just wanted to add that yes my disability does impact upon my sex life too- just because I’ve not got a visible disability doesn’t mean that it doesn’t- just not going to discuss it here on my blog today).

Motion Heading: Sexuality

Conference believed:

1. Society believes that disabled people are asexual and vulnerable and need to be looked after.
2. While the civil rights movement has put disability issues centre-stage there has been minimal discussion of disabled people’s sexuality.
3. Disabled people want intimate relationships like everyone else.
4. People make narrow assumptions when it comes to disabled people’s sexuality.
5. This brings about social barriers that prevent disabled people from having the same rights, choices and access to services that non-disabled people do.
6. Because of a low income plus negative attitudes and enforced stereotypes students with disabilities are often actively discouraged from seeking a social life.
7. In the area of sexual assault and rape these attitudes make disabled people more vulnerable to sexual assault and rape.
8. Sexuality is a right not a privilege.
9. Society’s attitudes that disabled students are asexual leave disabled students who are LGB in a potentially challenging situation.
10. While society is trying to deal with the idea of disabled people being sexual, the fact that a disabled student’s sexuality may be bisexual or homosexual can cause confusion and greater levels of hostility, discrimination and even violence.
11. As the gay community is a part of the wider society that we all live in, we must not forget that, unfortunately, these disabilities discriminatory attitudes exist within the gay community as well.
12. Furthermore, the disabled community do not always take into account LGB issues leaving homophobia to go unchallenged.
13. Therefore, SWD LGB students potential facing a high level of social isolation and a lack of visibility within society.

Conference further believed:

1. Disabled students who want a sexual relationship are not just up against the perception that they don’t want sex, there are also practical issues.
2. Disabled sex is a taboo but denying its existence we deny disabled students their full human rights.
3. There is little in the way of easily accessible, specialist advice on sex, sexual health and relationships for disabled students.
4. Every disabled person has the right to say no.
5. The area of disabled students’ sexuality has long needed to be worked on by the NUS SWD Campaign.
6. It’s reprehensible that a student’s disability should be seen as something to reduce the credibility of an accusation of sexual assault and/or rape.
7. The gay scene is particularly poor for access for SWD with few facilities having disabled access and the gay scene having very fixed views on what you look like – “body fascism”.
8. Body fascism can be particularly isolating for disabled students with visible disabilities and mental health issues.

1. To campaign for an equal sexual and social life for disabled students.
2. That the NUS SWD Campaign works with the Women’s Campaign whenever on the right to say no.
3. That the NUS SWD Campaign runs a Body Beautiful Sexually Proud campaign to include briefings, posters & postcards.
4. To work with organisations.
5. To lobby institutions to include disabled students in their welfare and sexual health campaigns.
6. To work with external organisations in the area to ensure their campaigns, information and services are accessible, available and relevant for disabled students.
7. For the NUS SWD Campaign to encourage open discussion around topics such as sex sexuality, love and relationships.
8. To lobby the media to have more portrayals of disabled people in sexual relationships.
9. For the NUS SWD campaigns to work in the future with REGARD the only disabled LGBT charity in the country.
10. To continue to support and work for SWD LGB students.
11. To further challenge any homophobic discrimination within the SWD Campaign.

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